My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
