he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
