Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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