is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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