Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
