I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
