I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize
