so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
