i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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