this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
