but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
