i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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