he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
