Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
