I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
