that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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