It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
