Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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