I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
