You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Randomize
