I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
