After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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