I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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