My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
We have started to decorate penises.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
