And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
