nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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