garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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