Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
