How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize