i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
