are you still at the devil's house?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
