You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
