no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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