Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
