Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
