I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
