You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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