I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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