i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
