i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
