Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
