Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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