Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
You're completely useless in the revolution.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I feel like death gave me a hand job
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
