She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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