guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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