everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
