You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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