I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
