We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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