Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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